Helping Generation Z Out of the Comparison Trap
In the beginning, social media platforms were almost magical. Twenty years ago, Facebook helped us reconnect with old college or high school friends. It enabled us to update our tribe and family members on the latest graduations, birth announcements or awards. Instagram came along, and millions liked that platform even better.
And then, we witnessed our vulnerability to addiction.
Over time, these platforms drifted from their original purpose. People moved from connecting on social media to performing. We perform in pursuit of more views, clicks, likes, shares and reposts. But, like any performance, competing and comparing soon raised their ugly heads. For millions of people, the most vulnerable being Gen Zers; the comparison trap can lead to jealousy, resentment, envy or feelings of inferiority.
What Happens When We’re Anxious and Jealous?
This “influencer” opportunity has affected their career goals. Do you know the top industry today’s youngest Gen Z job candidates are targeting? Spoiler alert: it’s not located in Silicon Valley or on Wall Street. It’s not even on Main Street, in their own hometown. The fact is, as Gen Zers assess the job landscape, those kinds of jobs seem bland.
What’s the top field they want to enter? The entertainment industry.
Media and entertainment tops the list of industries that Gen Z wants to work in, beating tech, healthcare and education, according to a report from Samsung and Morning Consult. The report, which surveyed over 1,000 Americans ages 16 to 25, found that Gen Z values flexible, creative jobs and careers where they can maintain a healthy work-life balance. What’s more, millions grew up on camera, even if it was only a selfie they posted each day.
While I don’t like this finding, it makes sense to me. Millions of Gen Zers have monetized social media, especially TikTok. And for 20 percent of those who have, it’s a full-time job. Creating content and making money, relatively quickly, has become an aspiration for many. Sadly, the fields that desperately need young workers don’t seem to have the sizzle.
For example, the number of education degrees earned in the U.S. has steadily decreased over the last 20 years (from 2003 to 2023). According to data from the American Association of Colleges for Teacher Education, bachelor’s degrees in education dipped from 109,622 annually to 90,710. In my humble opinion, becoming a teacher is one of the most noble and necessary vocations, but young adults see how emotionally expensive those jobs are, and how little most educators get paid, and they look elsewhere for their future.
It's time to get honest.
Could Altruism Be a Remedy?
If you’re like me, you vividly remember hearing about the murder of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson by a Gen Zer named Luigi Mangione. The crime occurred in broad daylight, an act of vengeance against the perceived corrupt healthcare industry. What I recall most, however, were the thousands of emojis posted afterward by people, often young people, who relished Thompson’s death, a symbol of our broken system. Call it schadenfreude.
But there is another story, a continuing story of how some overcame these reactions.
Eventually, many of those who celebrated this crime, decided to do more than celebrate. They realized that revenge is not a good path forward, and that Thompson had a family who now had no husband and father. Paulette was Brian’s wife, and they had two sons. As you can imagine, they were shocked by all of this. One by one, some of those who had posted celebratory comments at Thompson’s death visited Paulette’s home and left food and other gifts. No fanfare. No media coverage. No social media posting. Just acts of kindness.
The social disconnection these people felt was transformed into connection. They actually served the family of their perceived enemy. I am quite sure the satisfaction these selfless acts produced was sustained longer than the schadenfreude they felt earlier. Behavioral scientists report that schadenfreude is usually short-lived pleasure. Acts of altruism last longer and can be sustained as generosity and kindness continue. Peking University’s Yilu Wang and her colleagues reveal that “altruism leads to more sustained relief, promoting social connection, and life satisfaction,” according to Dr. David Hanscom. “Instead of defaulting to schadenfreude, one can choose altruism, focusing on helping others to transform their personal suffering into purposeful connection. It’s ironic—when we are selfless, we help ourselves, since those who serve improve themselves. So, we have a choice when caught in a comparison trap:
Get sad. Wallow in self-pity about others having more, and remain a victim.
Get mad. Continue sharing angry, vengeful social media posts to get even.
Get busy. Choose to serve the one we feel disdain for and improve ourselves.
My relationship with the fallen leader I mentioned above continues to this day. I love helping him whenever I can, and what I’ve done has not only eliminated any ill feelings but created a bond between us that fuels my own leadership. Altruism beats schadenfreude any day.
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