One Secret to Become Satisfied Again with Your Career
I have a friend who recently told me he’s combating burnout in his life by making some changes, at work and at home. He explained he needed to “spice things up,” making life more like it was when he was younger. At first, this made sense. As he went on, though, it became clear he was addressing internal dissatisfaction by making external changes. My friend just got a divorce, moved to a different city and is now looking for a new job.
I meet many people who are in a pursuit to recapture the joy they once had. They want to savor that earlier period of their lives where they felt more alive. They try changing jobs, cars, wardrobes or even partners. Some get cosmetic surgery.
Some of these changes will work for a while, but most are temporary fixes. Something happens to people biologically over time that they must recognize. It’s about looking inward, then reaching backward. External changes are only a Band-Aid. The changes inside require us to shift the source of our fulfillment and contentment.
Changing What Satisfies You
I found I had to shift where I gained my fulfillment from. I entered my career because it was a field I enjoyed and felt gifted to do. Over time, the jobs became monotonous, even dull. So, I doubled down on my efforts, trying to get better or faster at doing it. When people hit this stage, many begin to feel irrelevant. These feelings are signals, however, of a biological and neurological shift going on inside of us.
Healthy people enter the generative stage of life.
The theory of generativity was first introduced by psychologist Erik Erikson in 1950. It’s the seventh stage of his psychosocial development theory (generativity vs. stagnation), in which healthy people shift their chief concern from their own wellbeing to establishing and guiding younger generations. Another psychologist called it “our opportunity to outlive ourselves.” This stage usually occurs during middle adulthood (ages 40–65). Once people establish themselves, they recognize an entirely new fulfillment surfaces as they become coaches, mentors, parents, or spiritual guides, aiming to leave a lasting positive legacy. The painful part is that life is no longer about “me.” The pleasurable part is--I acquire a fresh sense of satisfaction as I age.
Past Satisfaction |
Future Satisfaction |
|---|---|
1. Doing the work well. |
1. Equipping others to do the work well. |
2. Looking for opportunities. |
2. Looking for people to invest in. |
3. Desire to be recognized. |
3. Desire to help others get recognized. |
4. Joy comes from productivity. |
4. Joy comes from reproductivity. |
5. I am a creator. |
5. I am a coach. |
6. I add value to the team. |
6. I multiply value to the world. |
Past Satisfaction
1. Doing the work well.
2. Looking for opportunities.
3. Desire to be recognized.
4. Joy comes from productivity.
5. I am a creator.
6. I add value to the team.
Future Satisfaction
1. Equipping others to do the work well.
2. Looking for people to invest in.
3. Desire to help others get recognized.
4. Joy comes from reproductivity.
5. I am a coach.
6. I multiply value to the world.
Beware—our current culture doesn’t encourage people to take their eyes off their own climb up the career ladder. Millennials have begun to enter midlife, and millions report feeling burned out and apathetic toward their jobs. Some even feel melancholy about their dashed dreams of happiness. Could it be that part of their solution is to mature into this generative phase of life? Failing to achieve generativity results in “stagnation,” according to Erikson, characterized by self-absorption, feeling stuck and neglecting to make a contribution to society. Perhaps Generation Z needs Millenials (and other older generations) to step up and mentor them. For that matter, Gen Zers could enter this generative stage early and begin investing in others, even before they have life figured out. There’s no law that says you must wait to become generative.
How did I do this?
I changed my scorecard.
I traded in my old “report card” for measuring success and replaced it with a new one that focused on spotting and investing in the lives of others. This affected my calendar, my credit card and where I burned my calories. New priorities led to a new schedule.
I repurposed my skill set.
Most of the skills I learned early in my career were now used to equip a generation behind me. I am having a blast teaching people to communicate on a stage, to write books, to lead teams and to practice emotional intelligence. Skills are like a baton.
I now see their success as my success.
John Maxwell did this for me when I joined his team over forty years ago. He was secure enough to pour into my life and see my successes as shared. He was not threatened by my achievements at all. In fact, we now both believe that success without a successor is a failure.
This year, I identified nine young men and women with whom I’m practicing generativity. Some approached me, and some I approached. Our meetings are so rewarding. I am enjoying what Dr. Erikson predicted: “Highly generative individuals report better health, higher life satisfaction, and improved relationships.”
FAQ
Why do people become dissatisfied with their careers?
Career dissatisfaction often develops when work becomes repetitive, disconnected from purpose, or no longer provides personal growth and meaning.
What is generativity?
Generativity is a stage of adult development where people shift focus from personal achievement to investing in and guiding younger generations.
What causes burnout in midlife?
Burnout in midlife can stem from chronic stress, lack of fulfillment, emotional exhaustion, and feeling disconnected from meaningful contribution.
How can mentoring others increase life satisfaction?
Mentoring others can create a sense of purpose, legacy, and connection that often leads to deeper fulfillment and emotional wellbeing.
What is the difference between productivity and reproductivity?
Productivity focuses on personal output and achievement, while reproductivity focuses on multiplying impact through investing in others.
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